24

Jun 11

You are viewing posts under the category: Relationships

How bad do you (really) want it?

Posted By keith

How bad do you really want itOne of the biggest reasons why people don’t achieve their goals is that they give up too easily.  They find an easy excuse (or ten) to tell themselves about why it will never work out.  

At first, they run on sheer excitement.  A dream of something better.  And when they take the first step, they get a taste of being closer to that dream coming true.  

And then life throws a curve ball.  The date with the cutie from the online dating site turned out to be an awkward disaster.  The job interview that went well didn’t turn into a job offer after all.  The goal to trek up a mountain suddenly seems impossible after the first few days of hiking.

Confucius summed it by saying, “Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.”

And we have the power question to help you rise every time you fall:


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1

Jun 11

You are viewing posts under the category: Relationships

Take a Risk, Sweetheart

Posted By keith

Take a Risk, SweetheartHow often do you let yourself take risks in life?  If you’re like many people, it’s far easier to just roll with the status quo.  There’s comfort in knowing what to expect in your day.  At the office.  In your relationships. 

But what if you haven’t reached your potential? 

What if you could become more?   Would you take the risk?

The photo and inspiration for this post came from a walk around part of Vancouver’s seawall.  Painted on a rock near the Cambie Bridge were the words, “Take a Risk, Sweetheart.” 

And for us here at Free the Goldfish Coaching, that’s a mantra to live by.  In fact, the premise of freeing the goldfish lies in taking risks and becoming all that you can be.  


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25

May 11

You are viewing posts under the category: Relationships

The Power of Re-realizations

Posted By keith

The Power of Re-realizationsRe-realizations.  It’s another one of our favourite terms here at Free the Goldfish Coaching.   Defined as a realization that seems to dawn on you time and time again. 

It’s the moment when you have an a-ha moment, only to remember that you’ve had the same a-ha moment before. 

There’s an old adage that says that life will keep teaching you the same lesson over and over until you learn it.  But like a good teacher, it won’t keep telling you the lesson in the same way, hoping that you’ll eventually get it. 

Nope.  Instead, life has an incredible skill to come up with clever scenarios, each one subtly different than the next, until you finally learn the lesson.   


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4

May 11

You are viewing posts under the category: Relationships

How to Really Know When the Relationship is Not Working

Posted By keith

How to Really Know When the Relationship is Not WorkingHow do you usually diagnose whether or not a relationship is working?  It can be tempting to get into list-making mode – with all of the pros and cons neatly organized.   Once the list is complete, we seem to be convinced that we’ll draw a definitive conclusion about whether or not we should be proceeding. 

Unfortunately, we’re probably just going to go in circles again for today.  For tomorrow.  Maybe even for months or years.

The trick?  Unless you can see the forest through the trees, you’re never going to be in a position to make a meaningful decision. 

List-building is like marking and counting trees.  It’s a lot of busyness without a lot of accomplishment. 

Focus on the forest.  With big questions that get you out of the details.  Here are a few of our favourites:


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27

Apr 11

You are viewing posts under the category: Relationships

Managing the Relationship Scorecard

Posted By keith

Managing the Relationship ScorecardKeeping score.  Almost all of us have done it at some point in our past or present relationships. 

When it’s done properly, the scorecard can set us up for a great relationship of trust, spontaneity and happiness.  When it’s done incorrectly, the scorecard merely acts like a hammer that pounds one nail after another into the relationship coffin.  Sounds dramatic? 

Perhaps.  But the prevalence of poor score-keeping in today’s relationships means we need a dramatic statement or two to wake us up from our bad habits. 

The current relationship scorecard usually runs something like this:


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